It has been two weeks since the wedding and it is confession time. No, it isn't the confessions of a wedding planner, but confessions to the wedding planner. You are about to read all about the regrets and rejoices of brides following their nuptials. These little details could quite possibly lead you to make better decisions when planning your wedding, and even more importantly, allow you to have a dream wedding-- without regrets! As a wedding planner I usually have the awesome opportunity to build a relationship with an exceptionally excited bride for 6 to 12 months of what is hopefully one of the happiest times in her life. These confessions run the gamut, no holds barred. Be prepared to be shocked, to giggle, and to cry, for I have heard it all.
1. Let's start with my least favorite and favorite post wedding comments,
“I should have listened to you.”
“Thank goodness I listened to you.”
Here's the thing; if you hire a wedding planner, use the wedding planner. Professional planners, coordinators, and consultants…we have done this wedding thing a few times. We know what really works, what has repeatedly failed, and what has made newlyweds leap for joy. When your planner offers you advice and suggestions-- listen. There is a reason we share this information with you. That reason is that we want you to have a perfect wedding experience.
2. If eating broccoli always gives you gas, don't have broccoli salad for lunch on your wedding day.
“For some reason I figured because it was my wedding day, I could forget my usual rules”
“I really thought that I would look different in the pictures.”
When you are a bride, it all seems like a wonderful dream. In these oh so grand dreams nobody ever has gas, humidity doesn't make your hair frizzy, you have a beyond perfect body, and pimples are non-existent. While your wedding day should feel like a dream come true, prepare for it like you would any other day, and then some; the same rules apply. So if you apply zit cream and wear a girdle every other day of the year, do it on your wedding day too.
3. Take time going over your wedding with the photographer(s).
“I really wish I had a picture of me with my mom and sister at the reception.”
“I wish we hadn't taken an hour to take pictures at the church”
“I love all the candid photos!” “I never got to see how the seating card table looked”
Most wedding photographers will happily take any photos you ask them to. The trick is to go over the details before the wedding. Once you hire your photographer, go through all the details of your wedding so that he or she knows what will be happening and when, what is important to you, and what you couldn't care less about. Make a list of absolute must haves and provide it to your photographer and coordinator prior to the wedding. That way everyone can work together to get everyone gathered and make sure these photos are taken. When budget allows, request a second photographer to take detail and candid photos only. This will allow one photographer to do the formal photos at your ceremony site and the other to capture the moments you are missing at the cocktail hour and get pictures of the reception site before everything gets “messed up”.
4. If at all possible, hire a videographer.
“Thank goodness you talked me into videography, I didn't realize I was never going to get to see everyone walk down the aisle!”
“I loved seeing the look on my husbands face just before I came around the corner, and hearing the gasp when he finally saw me. It's my favorite moment.”
“I am so glad I got to hear the best man's speech again…it was just hilarious!”
Every single bride and groom has told me the same thing-- that the day flies by and at least some of it is a blur. Having video is the best way to relive some of those amazing hours. If your budget will allow it, have the videographer cover your rehearsal dinner too, which is when you'll get most of those great speeches. Oh, and treat the videography the same as the photography, go over the details and make the must have list.
5. It's your wedding…not your moms, your best friends, or your florists.
“I should have stuck to my guns. I really wanted a small wedding”
“I hated pink flowers when she suggested them and I hate them even more now. No really, I HATE them more than you can imagine.”
“What was I thinking?”
Everyone has an opinion, a story, and advice when you're planning your wedding. While their intentions are no doubt good, they are not the ends all be all. Do everything you can to welcome these ideas, thoughts, and concerns; but take them just as that…ideas, thoughts and concerns. Your wedding is your personal celebration and it should be about the beginning of your new life with your groom. If you and your fiancé love karaoke, don't let anyone talk you out of the karaoke band for your wedding reception just because it isn't traditional.
Kelly McWilliams is the owner and founder of Weddings by Socialtes. The company provides wedding design, planning, and coordination services in southwest Florida. Kelly is well known for creating grand and one of a kind weddings with the "Wow!" factor. http://www.WeddingsbySocialites.com